Yesterday, as Gannon was building with Legos, he informed me he was making a guy. I observed his progress for a little while completely in awe of how far he has come with his imagination and his ability to create something with those plastic blocks. He seemed to begin to struggle. I could see it written all over his face. I asked him what was wrong, asked if he may need some help. He told me that there wasn’t enough room for a penis. On his guy. That he built with Legos.
And these, my friends, these are the moments that my own struggle is real. I immediately started laughing but this was a serious matter to this boy who was now looking at me, wondering why I was laughing and not helping build a penis out of Legos.
Obviously laughing could have discouraged this creativeness so I tried to stop. I offered a few tips and walked out of the room. I never want him to feel as if something he has thought up is stupid or a joke when he is very serious about what he is trying to accomplish. The feeling of humiliation is one that can happen at a very early age and can have such a negative effect. I do not want that to be caused by me.
I have been trying to remember him as a baby. My mind is failing me as the only memories I seem to recall are in fact just pictures, frozen in time. I have always been so proud of this little being. He never ceases to amaze me. Lately as he tells me stories that I simply can not begin to follow or understand I find my eyes filling with tears. He is this little boy, full of his own thoughts and ideas. A boy who is growing before my eyes, each and every day.
Someday he will be much bigger. Much older. Much different than he is now. I love watching his mind work and seeing him figure something out on his own.
I don’t think Lego guy ever did get his manhood but it was another moment where this mama realized just how amazing the brains of our children are. It was another moment I feel like I did right by that little guy. And as odd as it may be, it was another moment I was filled with pride.